I think in our society today, women feel like if they can’t do it on their own, they’re a failure. Like not needing anyone's help EVER is some sort of major accomplishment. We give awards both literal and figuratively to women who have done everything on their own, “I don’t need no man” sorta thing. We praise people who are alone, we falsely praise people who have “made it” and see them as having gotten there “all on their own.” This absolutely ridiculous notion that society has set as a standard (especially for women) is actually complete bullshit. Feminists rant on and on about how they can do everything on their own. Well I’m here to tell you that even IF you “can” do something on your own, the truth is you shouldn’t. I have tried both ways. I’ve done the all alone thing, never asking for help, advice, guidance, thinking I was ‘strong’ because I was doing everything on my own. Society actually rewards isolation, and then we wonder why so many people have anxiety or depression.
I just watched a quick video of Elena Cardone speaking of her life before Grant and her life after. She said that we need to debunk this idea that you can build an empire by yourself. No one has built an empire alone. Not a single person.
As a strong woman, it's hard to find a man that can sit at a table with all the things you bring to it. I know. Being outspoken, bossy, stubborn, always right (am I right?) it’s HARD to find someone who can take all of it and turn them into compliments. You’re not outspoken, you speak the truth, you’re not bossy - you’re assertive, you’re not stubborn - (jk I really am stubborn), you’re not always right - sorry - you’re wishful and factual at the same time. I’m a lot. I know it, it’s fine, I love who I am. I actually found a man who loves it too. And not just the good things. I truly believe that your “soulmate” is someone who sees who you are now, but even more so sees (& believes) in who you are going to become.
Today, we are told that we don’t need a man. Do it on your own! Well that sounds empowering and great but wake up… no millionaire/billionaire ever made it by themselves. I have always known that I wanted to be a millionaire. Not for the nice cars or fancy clothes but for the utter security. Growing up I had the most amazing family but there was always money on the mind. I knew from a very young age I NEVER wanted to have to worry about money when I grew up. I met someone who is very smart financially, like brilliant (I legit couldn’t even tell you what a 401k was until about a week ago). He had been raised and drilled with money saving advice, constantly and from all sides. So I have been reading books and doing research (and hired an accountant to deal with that 401k thing) and I have gotten significantly more aware of where my money goes and how to manage it. But for the most part if I need help, I ask him for his advice.
When Colt met me his plan was to continue in military things - reach that highest goal (still the goal today), maybe be a firefighter but probably graduate and then work that 9-5 like his grandparents told him too. He was brilliant with money, and he was drilled throughout his life that security is everything, so get a steady paycheck. He thought $100k a year was awesome and that’s what he intended to work up to. He had that entrepreneurial fire deep down but it didn’t come out until I unleashed my crazy entrepreneur spirit. The first time I told him I was going to be a millionaire by 28 he just laughed. But very quickly we were brainstorming businesses every night, going on texting rants throughout the day building businesses in our heads and he soon realized that the 9-5 was not going to be his life. My passion for business and building an empire was contagious (Yes I’m taking the credit baby sorry), and he now is on fire.
Why am I telling you this? God put us together. I mean he had a sense of humor AND a plan at the same time. (I mean seriously the kids name is Colt for goodness sake). So many things fell into place for us to meet/go out/ date/later on travel/and fall in love. Colt encourages me to do every single one of my crazy dreams, and I do the same for him. I sometimes have to reel him in and he does the same for me. Teamwork. Teamwork builds empires.
Elena Cardone said, “I found my power, and true strength, as a woman, by depending on a man (I know that sounds backwards).”
I could not agree/relate more. I’ve always been blessed with a wonderfully supportive family and so has he, I mean we both lucked out in the family department but the two of us understand each others visions like no one else does. We’ll say the things we’re working on and people will laugh, because it's simply too crazy to think that there's another way in.
Colt sent me an article the other day that talked about how the most successful people use the third door. What is the third door? Well when everyone is outside of a night club standing in line to get in, we are the ones that jump out of line run down the alley knock like crazy on the side door, find a window and jump in. We’re experts at finding a way in (and not waiting in line).
The purpose of this rant is to tell y’all that doing it alone sounds great, but getting help, having support and a team, will get you to the top. I have been lucky enough (shoutout God) to find the perfect teammate who it just so happens I’m going to spend the rest of my life with.
NEVER settle for mediocrity. I saw an instagram quote the other day that said,
“Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry”
Ooooooooo girl that gave me goosebumps. You are a strong, independent woman (lol but seriously), and it’s so powerful to be a woman I mean we have SO many things that rock, but do not think for a second that finding a man is going to slow you down. And if he does… SISTER HE’S NO GOOD.